it's been seven months...

It's been seven months since Max was born, seven more months working at Solar Turbines for their infrastructure team. In fact, I'm one of the infrastructurers--man, I just made up that word. Technically, I'm employed as a technical writer which is interesting because I'm now realizing that this job is the culmination of what I set out to do two years ago. I was hell-bent on working as a technical writer because it looked something that I thought I could do.

Well, I have the title and I can tell everyone that it's what I do but that's not really what I'm doing. I'm more of a data organizer and occasional production problem solver. If there is a problem with part of our production process, I write something in Perl that fixes it. Or, I figure out a way to wrap Excel around a solution. There are still quite a few things that I'm working on mostly because I'm still not that familiar with Perl--it's a very difficult language to master.

Regardless, the quality of my working relationships has improved dramatically and is making up for the fact that I'm not really crazy about what I do. It's ok for now and it provides me with medical insurance--me and my family. But I usually go home thinking about some problem that I couldn't solve at work. In fact, that happens almost daily.

So there are few things that I set out to do two years ago and have manifested. Here they are...

• get married again
• get a baby - Max
• become a Technical Writer

now I'm not sure where else to take things. I'm not sure what goals I should set. I talk myself out of so many things and I don't trust life as much as I used to. I'm more fearful and yet have more faith in God--I don't get it. It wasn't supposed to work this way.

It's time to reclaim the throne and I don't mean the toilet. It's time I take charge and get things done that I was supposed to get done both at work and at home.